Disclaimer: this is in no way reflective on my trainer, this is just me spouting off my current fears which are being discussed with said trainer.
This is me asking myself a very honest question:
"What the hell are you doing to your body?"
It's a good question, right?? You damn right it is!! The answer is, I don't know. I truly don't know what all this dieting is doing to my body but I do know what it's doing to my brain.
I have always had a relatively unhealthy relationship with food, I think in a way we all have and do. We relate it to memories, emotions, dates in time. A simple smell can bring you back to any given moment at any time. Being a woman I am stereotypically emotionally attached to food. The biggest trigger is stress but happiness seems to have the exact same effect on my brain.
In 4 weeks I'll be faced with yet another post competition time period and another chance to do things properly. To transition back in to life without blowing my body up. Last year, I had and blogged about the same plan and then life's stresses came in and took over. I let them. And it hurt. The physical pain was pretty bad actually. Needless to say I didn't take the time to add my previous foods slowly back in to my everyday diet.
Why isn't there more plans for this??? More conversation about what happens when you're through dieting for a show?? We spend so much time preparing only to leave the last leg of the journey to chance. So much hard work for what?
A pint of ice cream, a giant Reese's Peanut Butter Easter Egg, a burger loaded with fries and gravy on the side, more chocolate, a bottle (or 2) of wine, a bag of chips, and a trip to kiss the porcelain God, that's what.
Let me leave you now with this video on Metabolic Damage by Layne Norton. One of these best videos I have seen on the subject.